Monday, May 10, 2010

Top 50 Games - 48. Super Mario Bros.


Well isn't this ironic? Super Mario Bros. is the game I would, without hesitation, nominate for the position of Greatest Game of All Time, and here it is at #48 on my silly list. The cold, hard fact is that I didn't grow up in the 80's and so I'm a generation removed from the bright-eyed kids who popped this masterpiece into their new NES machines that fateful Christmas morning. And that does truly make me sad. However, playing this game decades later is consolation enough. In fact, I feel like jumping on a Goomba's head while listening to that inescapable World 1-1 theme could convince any disillusioned cubicle-dweller to step down from the edge. Super Mario Bros. is joy incarnate, the defining work of an eternal child, and the game we should thank daily for turning a technological novelty into a timeless source of happiness. For gracing us with your magic and defining my life's path, passion, and purpose, I thank you Miyamoto-san, from the bottom of my heart.

Top 50 Games - 49. Dragon Quest VIII: Journey of the Cursed King

I don't care how much you adore or despise Dragon Ball Z: Akira Toriyama draws some damn good character designs. When translated into glorious, cel-shaded 3D, his whimsical direction is in fact so enjoyably enticing that I forget I'm partaking in a random battle as a nameless mute hero. Dragon Quest is the old-school antithesis to Final Fantasy's bombastic futurism, and so Journey of the Cursed King is both refreshing and frustrating. The random battle rate is high, and I hate random battles. Oh God I hate them. But Akira Toriyama's characters, combined with enchanting music and a huge, beautiful world, save the day. While I'm all for progress and blazing ahead in a genre that clings so needlessly to outdated traditions, there will always be a place for humor, modesty, whimsy, and cheese-based attacks.

Top 50 Games - 50. Demon's Souls


Everyone who hears about Demon's Souls, whether from a paid professional or an inarticulate acquaintance, hears in tandem about its brutality. And it's true: Demon's Souls is a scathingly difficult game, full of lowly archers that snipe you to death from atop a faraway castle turret, ravenous dogs that patrol dark subterranean tunnels, armored spiders that immobilize you with their webs, and a stamina bar that's never quite large enough. But I'm not the kind of gamer that thrives on punishment, so why did I spend $60 on this nightmare? The answer is simple: quality. The levels, initially nerve-racking, end up becoming second nature due to their memorable layouts. The art direction is deceiving, appearing at first to be generic dark fantasy, but soon you realize that it was developed in Japan and not Canada, and the visuals become that much more compelling. While Demon's Souls does get me to take breaks from it so as to relieve the tension, when away I tend to daydream of kingdoms wrapped in malevolent fog, of praying at the bare feet of the Maiden In Black, and of that somber, endless cycle of life and death that will draw me back in.

My Personal Favorite Games of All Time So Far As of May 2010

I've compiled an ordered list of my 50 favorite games, which is admittedly more games than I thought I would want to include on such a list. However, at its completion I found myself leaving off a few gems, much to my surprise. For each entry, from the bottom up, I will provide an explanation as to why I am enamored with a game that you consider the pinnacle of shitty design.
Enjoy.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Final Fantasy XIII Impressions - 10 Hours In


There was a good amount of time there when Final Fantasy XIII was as anticipated as it was mysterious. For years, we survived on 3 or so CG screenshots of Lightning and that same goddamn train trailer. The wait was enticingly painful, and so the game's actual American release was a bit surreal. What added to the oddness, however, was the fact that a great deal of that former excitement had deflated. People were complaining about the corridor-like levels, the absence of towns, and Vanille. Amidst such disconcerting word-of-mouth, I had faith. I told myself, "I'm a fan of the series, I don't completely revile Tetsuya Nomura, and I know I'll like it more than Mass Effect 2." Well, now I've played it for 10 hours or so, and my faith is a little bit shaken. Yes, it's extremely linear, and yes, every time Vanille opens her mouth I want summon Bahamut and Megaflare her. But, as much as I hate her (and I really do), Vanille isn't quite the problem. She's part of a bigger problem with the game though, which is the dialogue and characters. Except for Sazh, who I genuinely like, most of the characters are kind of shitty. At first I thought Lightning was cool because she's a hardass with a gunblade, but then she started spouting some cringe-worthy lines and her luster faded. Snow was designed to be a douche and as such is a complete success. I actually kind of like Hope but he's also really really lame: he attacks with boomerangs and wears a scarf and orange pancho thing. Fang isn't in my party yet but she doesn't seem as cool as she thinks she is. I don't particularly like Tetsuya Nomura, but sometimes his designs are memorable and charming. FFXIII's characters exude nothing but J-Pop and gaudy excess. Add to that some okay but occasionally grating voice acting, and you have a letdown in one of the series' key departments: the characters (again, Sazh is exempt from this criticism). This is a big problem to be sure, but it's not the big problem. That one is a little harder to explain. Part of it actually has to do with an aspect that normally receives nothing but praise: the graphics. You see, in Final Fantasy XIII, the graphics are almost ridiculously good. However, they're good only for the sake of being good; to me at least, they seem to serve no other purpose. Graphics, I believe, only really matter when they work to benefit another more important aspect, such as doing justice to great art direction, allowing more possibilities in the gameplay, or enhancing player immersion. The graphics in FFXIII, shiny as they are, do none of these things. The art direction is a huge step backwards from FFXII's sophisticated Mediterranean aesthetic, looking like a more futuristic Spira, but without the cohesiveness or novelty. The gameplay outside of combat is barely more evolved than that found in the Playstation iterations, and all the visuals do is make the corridors look prettier. There are details everywhere, but they don't matter. This is my big problem with the game. It's beautiful, it's HD, it boasts a really fun and engaging Paradigm-based battle system, addictive levelling up and weapon upgrading, it's full of melodrama and epic world-shattering events... but I don't really care. I don't like the characters so I can't be drawn into the plot. It's got messy art direction and restrictive level design so I can't get absorbed in the world. There's little charm, the only humor that's there is uncomfortable and vaguely perverse, and I don't get all teary when Snow shouts "Serah!" for the eight-hundredth time. Don't get me wrong; this is kind of just a rant and the game really is good, but something important is missing. I've come to realize that those cynical assholes who say that the RPG genre is facing an existential crisis aren't wrong. For all the 1080p displays of Square-Enix's special effects trying to visualize it, the magic isn't quite there.